totally gay!


not as in “dude, that’s totally gay!” but i guess in a way it is. today i caught up on bravo homo tv that i missed last night. i didn’t really thinnk much about it until james, the dude from boy meets boy said something about changing just one person’s mind about his right to marry another man or show affection in public, and i thought, yah, that IS what we all try to do, right? open america’s mind one person at a time. that’s why i spent so much effort on wes’s discussion. anyhow i had just finished catchin up on gay tv and when i flipped back to live shows, there was this show on vh1.

the show starts with a little review, basically discussing where gays were in the media and in society in the year 1990 and then follows how things have progressed in the past 13 years without getting too political. it was gay history lite, but it meant alot to me because it started off right when i started caring. it also was incredible to see how far the acceptance of gays has come in the past 13 years, it honestly gave me goosebumps to see it all condensed down into one hour. i was in quite a bit of shock after watching it.

now all i can think of is if we’ve gotten this far in the past 13, even 10 years, how much further can we get in the next 10 now that gays have made a dent into society. i also can’t stop thinking whether it’s not time to just confront my mom. i spent some time talking to nigel tonight and he’s convinced me my mom is fully aware, but he can see the tacit understanding that we have. (god cheri’s right, he does sound like my hetero boyfriend, as can johnny i guess, since he and i have had this same conversation, i think). in a sick way i feel like putting up a poll: come out to mom officially, or maintain the tacit understanding, you decide. in the end i just don’t know that i have the courage to really confront her on this after so many years of not talking about it.


2 Responses to “totally gay!”

  1. 1 Johnny

    You should come out to your mom live on a webcam thingie! It would be totally post-post-post-modern.

    Surely we are the last generation who will be able to simultaneously 1) tell the world something on the web, and 2) keep it a secret from our folks.

  2. 2 Wynn

    Just stumbled upon your site. I am a hetero male but have a few gay friends. I think you should come out and tell your mom. It helps to clear the air in a way. My old college roommate for 2 semesters still hasn’t told his parents. He is in his late 30’s now with a PhD and still living a lie.
    You decide. Good Luck.

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